मेरी ख्वाहिशें

कुछ काँटों के बिछौने हैं,
जिनपे नंगे पाँव मेरी ख्वाहिशें चलती हैं.

जब छोटी थी ख्वाहिशें,
और कोमल थी एडियाँ,
बिछौना भी हरा रहता था,
हरे नर्म काँटे जो,
एडियों तले डब जाते,
गुदगुदी लगाते,
और मेरी ख्वाहिशें हसती खेलतीं,
नंगे पाँव इनपे चलती थीं।

वक़्त गुज़रा तो सालों की समझ में,
परत बा परत सख़्त हुई मेरी एडियाँ,
काँटों ने भी मुड़ना छोड़ दिया,
ख्वाहिशें मगर और फैलीं,
सूखे काँटों पे नंगे पाँव दौड़ी,
वो बिछौना भी ज़िद मे बढ़ा जाता है,
एडियों सा ही सख़्त हुआ जाता है।

कुछ साल बाद लगता है,
एक काँटों का बिछौना होगा,
जिसपे खून में लिपटी मेरी ख्वाहिशें खड़ी मिलेंगी।

आज, कुछ काँटों के बिछौने हैं,
जिनपे नंगे पाँव मेरी ख्वाहिशें चलती हैं.

मेरे शहर में अब शोर नही होता

मेरे शहर में अब शोर नही होता

अब बच्चे गलियों में खेला नही करते
अब घरों के शीशे टूटा नही करते
पहले आती थीं माओं की डाँटने की आवाज़
पर अब ऐसा किसी ओर नही होता
मेरे शहर में अब शोर नही होता

अब नुक्कड़ पे मोहल्ले के लड़के नही आते
अब छतों पे सूखे हुए दुपट्टे नही लहराते
पहले गूँजती थी नज़रों की गुफ्तगू चार सु
पर अब ऐसा मन किशोर नही होता
मेरे शहर में अब शोर नही होता

अब बाज़ारों में खरीद खरीदार नही आया करते
अब द्वार पे बड़े बुजुर्ग नही बतियाया करते
पहले लगते थे खूब दीवाली दशहरे पे मेले
पर अब ऐसा किसी छोर नही होता
मेरे शहर में अब शोर नही होता

अब बारिशें दीवारों के रंग नही बहा ले जातीं
अब हवाएँ पत्तों के संग नही मुस्कुरातीं
पहले चहकती थी सावन के झूलों पे किल्कारियाँ
पर अब ऐसा किसी भोर नही होता
मेरे शहर में अब शोर नही होता

अब बस मिट्टी में घुलती बू सूँघाई देती है
अब बस अधमरी इमारतों की चीखें सुनाई देती हैं
पहले थे कई रंग ओर बातें मेरे शहर की मशहूर
पर अब बस एक किस्सा चारों ओर होता है
मेरे शहर का सन्नाटा शोर होता है

Teri Baato.n ke Rang

तेरी बातों के रंग
चढ़े रहे दुपट्टे पर
मैने धोए भी,
और सुखाए भी,
धूप भी निकली,
और मेघ भी बरसे,
पर ये ज़िद्दी हैं

चढ़े रहे दुपट्टे पर..

यादों की हवा चली
तो जैसे बिखर गये
रंग घुल के हवा में,
खुशबू में बदल गये,
मैने सांसो मे समेटा,
और क़ैद करना चाहा,
पर ये शातिर हैं,

चढ़े रहे दुपट्टे पर..

लजा के एक सांझ
मैने ओढ़ लिये सर पर
तो ये चमक उठे,
रंग बिरंग जुगनू बनकर,
मैने हाथ मे पकड़े,
और रौशनी तरफ दौड़ी,
पर ये शरीर हैं,

चढ़े रहे दुपट्टे पर..

इत्त्वार का दिन आया
तो मेरे साथ हो लिये
बूँद बनकर आँखों मे,
मेरे साथ रो लिये,
मैने आँखें चुराना चाहा,
और बातें बनाई भी,
पर ये खामोश रहे,

चढ़े रहे दुपट्टे पर..

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Transliteration:

Teri baato.n ke rang
Chadhe rahe dupatte par
Maine dhoye bhi
aur sukhaye bhi
dhoop bhi nikli
aur megh bhi barse,
Par ye ziddi hai

Chadhe rahe dupatte par..

Yaado.n ki hawa chali
To jaise bikhar gaye
Rang ghul ke hawa mein
Khushbu mein badal gaye
Maine saanso me sameta
Aur qaid karna chaha
Par ye shaatir hain

Chadhe rahe dupatte par..

Laja ke ek saanjh
Maine odh liye sar par
To ye chamak uthe
Rang birang jugnu bankar
Maine haath me pakde
Aur raushni taraf daudi
Par ye shareer hain

Chadhe rahe dupatte par..

Ittwaar ka din aaya
To mere saath ho liye
Boond bankar aankho.n me
Mere saath ro liye
Maine aankhein churaana chaaha
Aur baaten banaayi bhi
Par ye khaamosh rahe

Chadhe rahe dupatte par..

Safar

चलते चलते मैं रुक जाती हूँ,
अगर बहुत दूर चली आती हूँ.
मुड़ के एक बार देख लेती हूँ,
अगर भूल जाती हूँ,
कि अकेले ही तो चली थी,
दिल को फिर समझाती हूँ,
अगर बहुत दूर चली आती हूँ.

कभी कोई तितली मिल जाती है,
तो पल भर को ठहर जाती हूँ,
नज़र भर को देख लेती हूँ,
अगर भूल जाती हूँ,
कि कई रंग है बेरंग दुनिया के,
एक नया रंग देख पाती हूँ,
अगर बहुत दूर चली आती हूँ.



कभी कोई नदी आ जाती है,
तो उसके साथ हो लेती हूँ,
फिर मोड़ पे अकेली हो जाती हूँ,
अगर भूल जाती हूँ,
की सब साथी नही सफ़र के,
फिर एक साथी छोड़ जाती हूँ,
अगर बहुत दूर चली आती हूँ.

कभी ठोकर लग जाती है,
तो गिर के संभल जाती हूँ,
कई बार रास्ता ही बदल जाती हूँ,
अगर भूल जाती हूँ,
कि लंबा सफ़र है, जल्दी नही अच्छी,
कुछ देर ठहर जाती हूँ,
अगर बहुत मैं थक जाती हूँ.

चलते चलते मैं रुक जाती हूँ,.
अगर बहुत दूर चली आती हूँ.
मुड़ के एक बार देख लेती हूँ,
अगर बहुत दूर चली आती हूँ.

P.S. It's been long. Exactly 21 years long ;)

Raindrops on my Window

All pretty, small and together
They laugh, they dance then wither
Singing a song, they mingle along
Disappearing back to where they belong

- The Raindrops on my Window

The Perfect Being

Pre-Script :One of my friend updated the following status on his fb :

When Apples were 3 and we were 4 ...my mom said "I don't like apples"

..and to torture you all..it reminded me of my following poem which i wrote when i was 14 (and edited when i was 16)..It's kiddish but the closest thing to my heart i would have ever written..Enjoy!


When I was four :
A heartily smiling face,
Looking down on me,
Swinging me with full pace,
Grabbing me with both hands,

The only one,
To be happy
When i passed step one

--She is my mother
The first memory of her.

When I was ten :

Tightly, steadily holding papers,
Asking a familiar face,
To fill them up,
Standing worried in a new school,

The only one
Though literally illiterate
Getting my admission done

--She is my Mother
One of the faintest memory of her

When I was thirteen :

Trying to console me,
Standing beside my bed,
Arranging the pills and syrup,
Moving fingers through my hair,

The only one
Greatly afraid
Still making me stand operation

--She is my mother
The most heartwarming memory of her

When i was fourteen :

Making me rest in her lap,
Encouraging me with most zealous words,
Unknown with Boards,
But preparing me for the trial,

The only one
Mysteriously filled
With moral information

--She is my mother
The most lovely memory of her.


When i am sixteen :

Ready for the most wisest advice,
Ready for the most warmest lap,
Ready for the most genuine care,
Ready for the friend in need,

Ready for the only one
I know will be with me
Always, at any situation

--She is my mother
The perfect idol on earth.


Post-Script : Isn't it simply amazing how your mother understand your world better than you....even when you refuse to admit that.. :)

Shattered Expectations

I come down to my knees
to please you..
to worship you..

But like all worldly Gods..
you turn gray
and run away.

Not realizing my
bleeding heart lays
beneath your feet..

You walk away crushing
the last hope
i hold to breathe

I don't know why
i fall so low
coming near your toe

What i want is small
i want you to hold me
and break this fall

Am i asking for
something big
you dont wish to give?

Say it again

Say it again, Oh Baby! Say it again
Let me be clear, Let me hear it again
Let me see my world fall apart
Oh Baby! Let me witness my part

I tell you I am not strong
But I know, I have to take this along
I know the words you will convey
Oh Baby, but if you should, then you may

Don't hide it, don't fake it anymore
Go if you want to, just say it once more
Don't worry if it will hurt, if it will pain
You see Dear! It's about love and loss, not gain

So, Say it again, Oh Baby! Say it again
Let me be clear, Let me hear it again

It's not easy, to see this fall
But it's harder, to carry this all
So It's better, you kill me right here
Oh baby, Don't bother about every year




When I look down in your eyes, today
I see no place, nowhere for me to stay
I knew you would leave me, somehow
It's a bit early Dear, But if it is, let it be now

So, Say it again, Oh Baby! Say it again
Let me be clear, Let me hear it again

And while you walk down the other way
For one last time, let me ask you this straight
You remember, the other day when you came
Was it only to leave me, all over again?

Letting You Go

.
I am lost, figuring unknown path
I am bleeding, inside my heart
I am quite, wanting to cry
I am alone, attempting to die

No,
I have to let this go
To live, to smile, to breathe
I have to let you go
To cry, to lighten, to be free

I loved, as if love is immortal
I smiled, as if happiness lasts longer
I believed, as if promises never break
I trusted, as if worlds all saint

But now,
I have to let this go
To live, to smile, to breathe
I have to let you go
To cry, to lighten, to be free

I have seen, tears flooding my way
I have felt, moments decay
I have experienced, love betraying
I have witnessed, commitment dying

And so,
I have to let this go
To live, to smile, to breathe
I have to let you go
To cry, to lighten, to be free


P.S. Last modified on my PC on 10.25.2009 @ 5:41 pm

I walk ahead, Leaving you to trace

Pre-Script : The topic is not new or unheard of. In fact, it's the one debated uncountable times ending on some absurd solutions every time. The biggest failure of "man"kind have been the disrespect of it's better half. For long women have suffered, subjected and kept patience. But not anymore. Things are changing. Slowly, yet transforming. It's a tribute to the longest war ever fought. "She" is winning and you have to notice that. "I" in the poem is the soul of women speaking to the Man (you) who held her as subjected for long.

I walk among you
My head held high
Altering the age-old notion
I walk towards sky

And I walk fast
As you try to race
Yes! I am ahead
Leaving you to trace

I have learn the art
Well before you predicted
I have set myself free
Of the chains you invented

I demanded my place
And before you could reject
I tried to stand
Only to walk this perfect

I have beaten you dead
In your own game
Perhaps, u made a mistake
When you called me lame

The pain and agony
I endured on your birth
Accumulated for long
Showing its worth

You tried oppression
You practiced strength
The atrocities you carried
Lasted centuries length

The more you tortured
The stronger I have hit your face
I now walk ahead
Leaving you to trace

A gentle Reminder :

Be careful of your duty toward God in Whom ye claim (your rights) of one another, and toward the wombs (that bear you)" (Quran 4:1).

Updates:
#1 Something is wrong with my pen..it's not working and i am not writing :( I wrote this poem in pencil :P
#2 My one year of hijab is gonna complete in 10 days. The countdown starts from today. yay! but i can't think of anything to write :(. Blame my pen.
#3 My visitors crossed over 1000. Actually its 1110 right now. what a number sirji! Thanku , thanku, thanks a lot to all my visitors for reading my rantings.
#4 I just realized i am ranting in a post i should not *shut mouth with both hands* (as if someone reading this small script. Duh!

Sleepless Nights

As i type this post, my mobile-cum-watch is teasing me with a time of 4:15 a.m...indeed it's late to be awake at this hour..when i am again supposed to get up by 6..and spend my 8 hours of day in bonded laborship...I can only pray that this seemingly never ending sleepless nights turns into a peaceful nap... eternal?? at this point of time..it hardly matters...

Still A Sleepless night..

Conversing with stars of my

Tragic tales, I cry

P.S. It is filed under Picture Perfect Tales only because i found the pic too beautiful to be disturbed by my silly verses - output of an over-burdened brain.

P.P.S. You believe it or not...you can take the Poet out of the Haiku but not the Haiku out of the Poet...complicated?? I am back with the Haiku.

I feel you around me, like air

.

The bubbling water washing my feet
The setting sun reddening peek
And the breeze lifting my hair
I feel you around me, like air


The deafening silence of solitude
The growing night bluing mood
The chilling wind touching my body bare
I feel you around me, like air


I feel you when I breathe,
When I walk, when I sleep
I feel you when I am alone
When in a group, when I am home


I feel you when I am down
When I am happy, when I frown
I feel you living in my soul,
In my heart, somewhere very close


The words won’t let you know
Neither the tears which mourn
On how much I miss you
On how much I love you


But believe me I swear, always
I feel you around me, like air

** Little does a person knows when his words become so situational..so realistic...so hurting..

Companion for me is you..

Crushed hopes, dark world, lost ways and killed aspirations

Once, there was a world of such devastations.

Mourning continued, sobbing followed, night kept creeping in

Plight like this, and a girl fastened there in.

And all the miracles of which mortals are aware; seemed false

Nothing worked, all went in despair.

Indeed the only thing she needed was a little love, a little care

Or may be a little stretched hand to support; but

None came, none bothered and she was left alone.

For a while, suddenly the prayers seemed to come true

On a far land, came an angel, as human he grew

Ripping the darkness, steeped in her little world, wiped her tears off

Making an unsaid promise, held her hand and walked short

Entwined fingers, shivering body and a new ray of hope

Inside she was afraid, but knew now she ll cope

She knew, the angel came for her, came to love and trust her

Yes, she knew he came to be a companion of her

Oh, how happy she was, to be loved, to be cared, to be trusted all again

Unending tears followed, but this time, not in vain.

P.S. It's the nearest poem to my heart...something which came so deep from my heart that i almost forgot that it was just a mix of words...:)
P.P.S. this is actually a dedication, which i forgot to mention ...it's dedicated to the sweet "Angel" who has made my life sugury sweet..with added touch of salt and pepper when he loses his patient nerve :P

Poem again..

** Following is just my take on the Choodiyan fever prevalent in lounge..and a rather useless attempt (again) at hindi poetry...spare me for these poetry posts..but i am just enjoying it.. :)

“Chand choodiyon ke intezaar me
Paagal roye rehti hai
Hasti khelti thi pehle
Jane kyun ab khoyi rehti hai

Har subah sadak pe
Sooraj ki laali jab chaati hai
Nange pawn wahan ye
Khoyi si Daudi jaati hai

Sheher ke simt tikaye nazren
Jaane Kisko khoja karti hai
Har aati bus se utarte logon me
ek jaana chehra dhundha karti hai

bikharne ke baad bhid logon ki
ek udaas aansu gaalo pe therta hai
Fir unhi Bheegi jhuki aankhon se
Sooni kalaiyan taka karti hai

Kuch soch wahi palken utha ke
Fir wahi simt dekha karti hai
Chand chudiyon ki intezaar me
Paagal roye rehti hai”

“ kuch gehre khayaalon me
din bhar khoya rehta hai
chand tooti choodiyon ko
akele me chooma karta hai

jab aur log ghanti sunne pe
khaane ko jaaya karte hain
ye kuch note roz mod k
ek dibbe me jama karta hai

Guzarte waqt bazaar se
Roz wahi gali tham jaata hai
Rangeen choodiyon ko pyaar se
Dekhe jaye jata hai

Ek chehra fir ankhon pe
Kuch der theher jaata hai
Saabut choodiyan ka rang use
Zeher sa chubha jaata hai

Dobaara fir kuch soch ke
Who note gina karta hai
chand tooti choodiyon ko
akele me chooma karta hai”

●๋•gυℓѕнαη●๋•™ - an attempt towards Acrostic poem

Greatly thankful to God for being so kind

Unfurling happiness from the boundaries confined

Lighting my little world with all I can

Shaping my surroundings as it shapes mine

Holding a vision and aspirations high

A little sane and a little insane mind

No one or someone - I am enjoying being ●๋•gυℓѕнαη●๋•™

P.S. Read this post at WL ...cheers!!!

My new Love ::Limerick::

So again, it’s proved that my mind can’t be stable for long. Some chemical locha will happen and I ll be fully in that…Study is seriously a great booster for it..If not for them I would have not thought of winding up my time (whatever I get :(, in something creative and good thing like haiku..love them all…just love them…)

Before even I managed to get out of it see I am trap in another (actually 2 of another)…One is Limerick, a kind of poetry cracked by Edward Lear. Here goes the rule for it.

1. It is five lines, single stanza poetry.

2. The syllable structure goes like this 9-9-6-6-9

3. Unlike haiku, rhyming here plays a great part. The first, second and fifth line should rhyme with another and third and fourth lines have a separate rhyming.

4. The first line should end up with a place’s name. (something really important)

5. It is supposed to be FUNNY (challenging!!).

So, if you are fed up with me on this experimental poetry writing drive, you can blame this on Ram. He introduced me to this one. Here goes his first Limerick, which is (purposely) dedicated to me :

I met a smart rabbit in Madras
With a special aura so wondrous
And with red hot temper
And Very horrifying anger
Still she is royal as a Heiress

And here is something from me :

“Relations on a virtual space
Are not stable, and often lack grace”
Those who say this and feel
Are they from real or reel?
Call them here, let them feel the embrace

*This is not actual Limerick, as it lacks the funny thing in it, but still just gave it a shot, for sake of it..

This is in response to a Limerick posted by TAN

Tan's Limerick

A bald old man from Delhi
Had the most voluminous belly
In Chandni Chawk
He flutters like a hawk
All know him as Mr. Smelly


My Limerick (continuation)


Of crowded and fast paced Delhi
From which ever road passed Mr. Smelly
The way he used to walk
All Children used to mock
But he didn’t care and ate more jelly


Now this is of course better..anyone continuing??

**And ya i wrote about two arts..the other is funny and just plain to enjoy..ll be posting it soon.


Stay Blessed and NJOY !!!!!

Passing thoughts....

Hunger



Hunger striking hard
Silence Prevails, none to care
Cold crime cuddling all..


Missing You



Why you have to be
Like sand, more I close my fist
More you slip away..


Friendship



Red eyes and harsh words
-- Teary eyes and long silence
Is this “the friendship?”



Winter



Winter is back here
Can I be a cold blooded
..In hibernation?



Love..



All lost in bright lights
Of party late night, but you
--calling my number


Borders



Dividing nations
Boundaries perfectly drawn
By evil man’s hand.

Originally posted by me on WL